It Would Be Nice to Start Over Again

I desire to start over. I need a new life. I desire to become somewhere far away.

You've reached a major turning point in your life. For i reason or another, you want to say farewell to your erstwhile life and outset a new chapter. This is not a decision to be made lightly, but at this bespeak I'll assume you already know it's what you want. Trust me, I've been there.

Making this kind of change is never easy. But y'all can help mitigate your feet with some skilful old-fashioned preparation.

So, how do I outset over?

I have gone through many huge life changes, all of which required leaving behind an old lifestyle and embracing a new 1.

You know what I think? Information technology's kind of like existence a spy. When I was a kid, I idea existence a spy would exist pretty neat, so in a way I've kind of achieved that.

Hither'south what I've learned from my own experiences of starting a new life:

Inspect and Strategize Your Resource

If you lot're able to be flexible, you can nonetheless make it while having niggling to your name. The worst aspect is taking inventory and accepting whatsoever that is.

A box, bicycle, two instruments, and a few miscellaneous items.

It's not always a lot.

Knowing what y'all accept available to you will assistance you to make this work to your favor. Remember the spy analogy? Spies are known for their ability to make it and out of any situation. How do they practise this? They know what they have, what they don't, and how to use their resources creatively to get what they desire.

Here's my personal checklist for this:

ane. The Monthly Budget

Coin is the source of all stress.

Visa, loan, awarding, <your case here> denied? 98% of the time you lot didn't have enough coin.

Despite what they say, money can aid yous purchase happiness. Information technology helps you lot feel secure in the uncomplicated things like eating and sleeping with a roof over your head.

Start by counting up all your assets to meet how long your cash would last you every bit you currently live without any more income. Then, endeavour to run into how far you could stretch it to make it last every bit long as possible. Retrieve of it as a mental practise. Which expenses do yous absolutely need? Which ones can you get rid of? Perhaps your cell telephone is a must-have item, merely your daily cup of Starbucks can go.

After, ask yourself how you tin start increasing your monthly income in this new life of yours.

2. The Skills

Your skills are an asset.

Tin can yous write? Draw? Photograph? Organize? Bathe pets? Make clean a firm? Make beds? Programme iOS apps?

Write downward all your skills, big and small. Whatever you lot can do, you lot should consider information technology an asset. Work tin exist traded for accommodation, nutrient, and coin. These are all important to your time to come.

Don't sell yourself short. Just because y'all don't have a higher pedagogy doesn't mean you lot're not worth being paid for a job. Write it all downwards.

These are the things you have at your disposal to make more money down the line.

Have a skill you lot don't know yet, only really want to add together to your repertoire? I recommend going all out and use the obsessive learning technique I love to talk about so much. (That'south more of a pirate thing though.)

3. The Debts

There is an astonishing amount of personal debt, and it can be incredibly stressful to deal with.

List your debts in order from smallest to biggest. Enquiry the legal rights you nonetheless take if yous are unable to pay any of them. Are your debts deferrable? Is there a liable asset of yours that they can seize?

Know your rights.

Paying down your debts is your fastest route to financial freedom. My recommendation in your new life is to live on minimal expenses, dedicating every terminal penny to getting rid of your debts, snowball mode. That ways paying off your smaller debts first and and then worry well-nigh the large ones.

Plan for Best Case, Worst Case Scenarios

One of my biggest fears is that everything is going to go dreadfully wrong.

That's why, at whatever given point, I have two or three wildly different plans for what I'll do if something goes sideways.

Here's a few examples from my ain life:

Backup Program: Visa Awarding Edition

Talk about international intrigue! Take a chance! I'm currently applying for a visa to stay in Germany.

Cologne, Germany Bridge

Of class, at that place's no guarantee it volition piece of work out the way I hoped. To bargain with this, I have ii alternative plans to follow in the event my long term visa application is rejected.

Plan 1: I tin either fly onward and hop my way effectually the world, spending a beggarly $350/mo on flights and still exist domicile to visit family for Christmas.

Plan 2: If that doesn't work, I can fly direct back to the States, move to a inexpensive city and pick upward work while I save upwards for the next big adventure.

Backup Plan: Bicycle Tour Edition

Last year, I planned an insane solo bicycle bout from San Diego to Salt Lake City. In that location were a lot of unknown variables. Any 1000 plan will – information technology'south inevitable. Plans are just guesses, anyways.

The questions about the viability of my trip piled upwards.

Could I make it in time to start my summer job? Could I survive at all, since I'm usually a total burrow potato? What if something went terribly wrong?

Earlier heading off, I researched every possible fill-in programme for transportation. Every footstep of the fashion, I knew the closest shuttle or autobus system that could have care of me. I made sure that my friend picking me up at the end could drive down a little farther south to meet me, in case I wasn't where I expected to be by the finish.

Anne Dorko selfie

Spoiler alert: I totally made it!

What'southward Your Backup Plan?

When you leave everything backside, yous also leave behind comfort and predictability.

A spy is ready for every situation, good or bad. It involves a lot of thinking on your feet and practicing the art of devising creative escape routes.

Think out the worst-case scenarios, such as:

  • Your new job lets yous go
  • Your house burns downwardly in flames
  • The airline loses all your things
  • Your visa doesn't get canonical
  • The bicycle you're living on falls to pieces

What will you practice if something like that happens? Where will you lot get? Who will you turn to?

This is the indicate where most people panic. That's a completely normal initial reaction. But the truth of the matter is, sometimes this stuff happens. Panic about information technology for a minute at present, and so have a step back to think through a rational 2d plan of action.

Recollect outside the box! As they say, when one door closes, another opens. Or perhaps it's time to climb out the window.

Maybe you lot can pursue an entirely unlike career. Or you tin can volunteer on a WWOOFing farm. Teaching English in Southward Korea sounds like fun. Seriously, get crazy with it. Having a wild alternative to turn to has a strangely calming effect. There is so much to do out there in the world. Information technology'southward a huge identify.

By the manner, are you keeping backups of your of import documents? If your vital paperwork is destroyed or stolen, caches and digital backups can do you a lot of good.

In any example, taking the fourth dimension to dream out completely different courses of activity helps in a couple of ways:

  1. You lot don't feel boxed in by your immediate circumstances. At that place are always alternatives.
  2. You've already created rational courses of action to tackle unpredictable situations.

Backup plans help to accept out the element of surprise and chance. That said, don't let your fears go the all-time of yous. The point is to be prepared in case of emergency, but don't allow these concerns dictate your life!

Use your backup plan equally a condom net to ease the anxiety, and and so let it exist.

Choose How to Commemorate Your Things

Letting go of stuff is difficult. We create a deep emotional identity in our belongings. When you're new to the do, it's especially difficult.

But when it'due south fourth dimension to move forrard and go out your erstwhile life behind, you take to learn to let belongings go. In my stance, there's a reason every order is steeped in rituals. Rituals aid us cope with what is outside of our control.

In the same style I recommend you create a ritual to deal with letting your property go.

It doesn't need to involve an chantry or idol, but pick out a few methodical steps to walk through before making your way to the dumpster or donation center.

Here's i of my own rituals:

  1. Accept a moment with the item. Look over information technology, call up virtually the times and memories associated with it.
  2. Write downwardly annihilation that really stands out. Depict the particular in textured detail. Chronicle your favorite story. Talk about how it came into your possession. Mark downward why it feels so important.
  3. Take a digital photo.
  4. Put it in a special, clean trash bag earlier throwing it away or donating information technology.

Evaluate What Home Means to You lot

The idea of home is an evasive one.

Is dwelling house a physical location? A feeling? A person? I believe in that location are many definitions and types of emotional homes, much in the same way we have different physical homes. However, it's not a question you ever ask yourself until you move away from… domicile. Whatever that means to yous.

Sometimes it

Sometimes it's just having a decent bed to sleep on.

Much similar our holding, home plays a lot into our identities.  When you live somewhere else and are surrounded by new culture and unlike ideas, you change. Not necessarily for better or worse, but a new version of you will emerge.

Yous may never pin down what home means to yous, but knowing that nosotros all search for information technology helps to cope with the weird feelings you get.

The best part is if you begin to identify what little pieces feel like abode for you, you can learn to put them dorsum together wherever you are in the world. Considering even adventurous spies get homesick sometimes.

Acquire to Capeesh Family

Family.

The people who raised you, grew up with you, were there for yous in your times of need.

When you go out everything backside, it tin can as well mean yous're leaving everyane backside. Whatsoever your reasons are for starting a new life, leaving backside everyone you know can exist a very lonely experience.

This is where the idea of a rogue spy goes sideways. Being a lone wolf isn't all it's cracked up to be.

Feeling alone and rejected is not healthy for us as humans. Just considering you're moving on in the earth does non mean yous should ever experience this way.

Starting over often comes with sudden clarity as to who your real family is. In some cases, you needed a fresh outset to get away from bad relationships. When you tin can, hold onto those you lot left behind – you lot don't demand to completely start over. In whatever example, family unit doesn't demand to be claret related, and you practice need to create a support arrangement for yourself wherever you wind upwardly.

Thankfully you can go along in touch with the friends and family you lot already take via services like Skype, WhatsApp, Facebook, and e-mail.

And sometimes, they come to visit you in your new home.

And sometimes, they come up to visit you in your new home.

Simply what about the people around you after the move? Being able to meet up with other people to talk, love, and play with is also of import. In your new life, it's useful to learn how to form new friends. Start by exploring your new city and meeting people.

In the end, don't forget well-nigh the people you grew upwardly with and the people who volition miss y'all. At the same fourth dimension, go on an open mind and heart for the new souls you'll run into as you move on.

What Does This All Mean?

Starting over is a practice in introspection. You volition be forced to re-evaluate your beliefs, actions, and behaviors. Who are you when y'all are stripped blank of your usual environment? How do you comport when left to your ain devices when no one y'all know is watching you?

At that place's no one right way to leave everything you know behind and start over new. However, a few things are certain.

When you have the time to:

  • Evaluate your resources,
  • prepare for worst case scenarios,
  • ask yourself what home ways to you, and
  • value the relationships in your life.

You lot'll exist much better prepared to tackle the new life ahead of yous. Kind of like a badass spy.

Take you ever had to start over fresh? What helped you go through the change?

Are you almost to go through a big life alter right now? What questions do you still take about the process? Let the states know your stories and worries for the future in the comments below.

Photograph credits: Seriously Inspired

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Source: https://withoutboxes.com/start-over/

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